Small Mind, Big Opportunities: Leadership Stones in Challenging Times

When the Pandemic hit, I immediately started writing a series of blogs about what I had learned when leading through challenging times. I started several, and posted a few. I pride myself in my ability to respond to challenges, and I was eager to share in a systematic way what I had learned.

And then I posted nothing. For weeks, then months: no postings. Trying to regroup, I half-heartedly posted a Call to Action asking others to share their leadership stones, but I didn’t share the blog with others. I started a few blogs about living small and managing virtual collaboration, but did not finish them. I occasionally shared my learnings with people in the organization where I was working, but there was little interest in continuing the conversation.

Without a specific leadership role within which to act, I had few opportunities to continue developing stones, building my wall. I was living small, not only in my life, but inside my own mind.

I found myself complaining a lot… about national leadership, leadership in our membership organizations, my own place of employment. I will admit—none of it was particularly productive. I felt sidelined and sad—minimally productive and unmotivated.

And then, I had the opportunity to connected with a small group of leaders from across the country. We began Zooming regularly, talking about issues of concern, gathering our thoughts about how things might improve. A few individuals offered to organize our thoughts into a letter of sorts—one that articulated the opportunity that these challenging times afforded and the specific things we thought should happen. Together we wrote, edited, and rewrote, until we had a product ready to share.

The specifics about this exercise are not important to this blog. What is important is how it felt to go through the process of collaborating, strategizing, regrouping, and coming up with a product. And it reminded me again of how important gathering our pearls of wisdom and applying them to current circumstances is.

There were so many things about this group that spoke to me. We had all held leadership positions within our professional lives and had been active in membership organizations. We served on boards, held offices. Some of us had worked for the same organizations or in different positions during the same time periods. Our collective experience was rich and worth continuing to explore.

I have relearned the importance of collaboration during this time where we are seldom in the same room together. It is critical to reach out and connect both within and outside of one’s current circumstances. And I have found that connecting with those with whom I would not typically cross paths has been particularly effective.

Here’s the leadership stone: Without connections, we become stuck in our own heads. It’s lonely there. Move past the smallness of your mind and reach out to others. Use the time to reconnect, share, and expand your mind. Work on a project together. Invite others to join. Today’s virtual environment affords us endless opportunities to connect. Choose what works for you.

Sharing your Leadership Stones: A Call to Action

When I first set out to be a blogger, I wasn’t sure where to start. My head was exploding with writing material—lessons from being an educator, thoughts on books I had read, perspectives from my many years as a leader. When I began using the New England wall concept to organize my thoughts, everything came together. I discovered that the things I had learned could be organized into something that was functional and that I could share with others.

Preparing for a speaking gig in New Hampshire last fall, I began to realize that the actual process of forming and placing leadership stones was a powerful tool in and of itself and that  I needed to share with others. It’s a simple concept, really—a way to bring form to what we learn in a way that makes it useful.

Here is the method, simply stated as a metaphor.

A New England wall is made up of stones recovered from land being prepared for planting. The recovered stones differ in shape and size, but when collected and arranged together, they become something that is purposeful: a wall that defines, contains, protects.

Years of reading, learning, working, and connecting with others have left me with a wealth of leadership ideas—stones for a metaphorical wall, if you will-- that I am excited to share with others. The process of gathering these ideas into a cohesive form in itself has been enriching in and of itself. Exploring how those experiences and pieces of information fit together (as I build my New England wall) keeps me growing as a leader. And as I add new stones, I sometimes find that I need to rearrange others to accommodate new learnings.  My leadership wall is ever-changing and evidence of my own personal growth.

I am acutely aware that my colleagues and friends possess wisdom that needs to be shared. At the conference session I led last fall, I shared some examples of “stones” I had collected and asked the attendees to share some of their own. Nearly everyone participated, and without exception, their responses were thoughtful, creative, and diverse. I was in awe of the collective wisdom in that small room, and I walked away thinking that there was a need for this kind of sharing.

As any generation of leaders passes the torch to the next, there is a real need for opportunities to share our experiences and the things we have learned. I am writing this blog as a call to action for my fellow leaders to write down and share some of the leadership stones they have learned through the years.

This is an open invitation to share: What are your leadership stones? What stories can you tell—of great leadership examples that should be followed, as well as those where you’ve learned what not to do? Please email me your stories at dorinda@dorindarife.com and I will compile lessons learned and share them through my website. Aim for, say, no more than 500 words. I look forward to hearing and learning from you—and the opportunity to share your New England wall stones with our community.

On Finding your Village

You’ve taken the course, read the book, applied the technique. You’re convinced that this tool, this skill or methodology is the bomb, and that other leaders should follow suit. You find the perfect example of its brilliance to share with colleagues and then… nothing.

 Early in my teaching career I was trying to build energy around an idea I had for moving the rural school I was working at forward. I shared my frustration with a colleague who was also relatively new to her job but not to the field. She said to me, “Honey, you’ve got to find your village.” In a school of 120 students in a part of the state I had just relocated to, it was hard to think in terms of villages. But she was right: wherever you are in your career path, finding others who are like-minded or similarly motivated is critical.

 Finding one’s village today is much easier than it was in 1982. Tools abound to help us connect with others with similar interests or aspirations. Apps like MeetUp allow us to plug our interests and location into a search bar and peruse local groups that we might join. Online communities ranging from listservs to more updated venues like Slack are designed to bring together groups of people with common interests in order to work toward a common goal.

 A village of two can work as well as one of 20 when there is a specific goal in mind. I remember vividly the first time I sat among principals of schools for the blind—astonished and proud to be with people who “got” what I did. I left that meeting renewed by our common experiences.

Working alone is important for deep thinking, writing, and completing administrative tasks. It allows one to reflect on problems and ponder one’s progress. But many tasks are best suited for a group of some kind, especially one that is motivated and comes with lots of experience and a willingness to share. Find your village, dear leader. You will build skills impossible to attain on your own… and you will sleep better each night knowing you belong to a tribe that has your back and will propel you forward.

What's all the hype about collaborative leadership? Read on.

“The basket that has two handles should be carried by two people.” –Egyptian proverb

I heard this quote at a conference I recently attended. It reminded me of my strong belief in collaborative leadership and its importance as a leadership stone. In truth, I have left many situations--organizations, committees, clubs, friendships—because they violated my overwhelming belief in collaboration.

Let’s take a look at our track record in advancing causes and cultivating constructive change in the very small field of visual impairment, blindness, and deafblindness. It is through the collaborative efforts of those willing to focus on a strong mission and purpose that positive change has occurred. Putting aside personal agendas and focusing on what we have in common has enabled us to agree on a common braille code, for example, and to ensure that those with unique needs receive the services they need. 

This leadership stone is one of the most difficult to achieve. I remember a situation when I was principal of a school for the blind. My office was next door to that of the school for the deaf principal, and we got along well. During my time in that position, we were able to greatly improve compliance in state-mandated processes, using a cross-departmental training approach that improved standards in all programs. For example. our counselors worked collaboratively to devise a suicide risk policy that kept our students safe. They also began working school-wide on student events to promote kindness and keep student harassment at bay, connecting students who were deaf and those who were blind in meaningful ways.

That principal left her position to return to the classroom, and the new principal began her tenure by creating and implementing goals and committees for the school for the deaf only. My attempts to approach her about continuing the initiatives that were in place were met with a sound “I don’t think we need those anymore.” I made several more attempts to find common ground and was unable to make any progress. The excitement and energy created through collaboration dwindled.

Did it make a substantial negative difference in our mission to do things separately? I think so. What I found was that energy shifted. Initiatives continued, but the speed at which things were accomplished slowed, and general morale among those who were used to working collaboratively decreased. Eventually, initiatives that were dependent on working together ended completely.

Two substantial benefits to collaboration, then, include making change happen at a respectable rate and improving employee engagement and morale. So why is collaboration so hard to achieve, and how do we go about convincing our colleagues that it is a critical part of a healthy organization?

My hunch about why the collaborative model is so often rejected is that people focus on its perceived negatives. I call these the myths of collaboration. They include:

·      It takes too long.

·      We’ll get too many ideas if we include others.

·      We don’t have enough in common to collaborate.

·      I lose my power if I “give in” to collaboration.

·      Hierarchical decision making is better because those at the top have the big picture.

Why do I call these myths? They are stories, not truths. They do not take into account the roots of the word collaboration: com- teamed up with laborare to form the Latin word collaborare, or “to labor together.” Laboring together toward a common goal encourages participants to consider other viewpoints and tap into additional knowledge resources. A well-run collaborative project creates energy and a sense of buy-in from the start, since it is inclusive.

A successful leader needs to be an example of collaboration in her day-to-day work. One fruitful example of this is using the technique of round robin when “camps” form around a particular decision or direction. The meeting’s facilitator simply asks each participant to state his or her position about a topic with a short explanation. Everyone speaks, and no one responds to the speaker. It is about listening. I have seen this technique help build compromise without sacrificing principles. Working together toward a decision ensures that you take many points of view into consideration.

Not everything should be accomplished collaboratively, of course. Sometimes a decision must be made on the spot, and sometimes one leader is best equipped to independently make certain decisions. Even in those cases, however, the collaborative leader has been actively learning from her peers so that the information she applies to her decision is based on collective knowledge.